RIP Jasper

Last Tuesday I took Jasper to be put down. Monday morning he woke up at 4:30am and started peeing on our bedroom floor. He couldn't help himself, he couldn't stop either. I felt so bad for him. Monday morning Jason asked if I had called to make an appointment yet and I said no, deep down I was just waiting for him to ask. I wanted Jason to be ok with the decision. I didn't want to feel like I was making it. We were going to take him to our regular veterinary but they couldn't get him in until Wednesday and I just knew he needed to be put out of his misery as soon as possible. So I called the vet just down the street from us, my parents had taken our dogs there growing up, and they had an opening Tuesday morning.

Unfortunately, I was the one to take him. I'm allowed to be up to an hour late in the morning or leave an hour early in the afternoon every once in awhile if I need to do something. This flexibility is convenient but in this case sad. Monday night I cooked a steak dinner and corn on the cob and gave Jasper his bowl full with a whole steak and corncob. Tuesday morning I woke up and got ready for work, then he jumped in the truck with me and we headed to the vet. I was ok until I had to talk to the vet about what he had been going through. I looked down at Jasper and second guessed my decision, as if he had miraculously started looking better to me, but I knew it was time, his breathing had become too difficult and his attempts at even going up the stairs had become painful for him. I gave the vet the leash and of course Jasper didn’t want to go. So I walked a little ways into the room with him, asked the vet if they would be ok, he said yes and I left. I checked out and then sat in the truck. About 15 minutes later the vet rolled a cart out with a closed bag. He gently put him in the truck for me and I drove home. Jason had dug a hole with the neighbor’s skidloader the night before so I just backed as close to it as I could. I think the hardest part of this whole process was taking that bag off the truck and putting it in the hole. I wanted to be gentle but I didn’t want to feel him inside. I tried to grab a part of the bag and felt something so I let go and started sobbing. I tried again, this time trying to just go for it all in one motion and I succeeded.

Now I just morn. I morn the loss of this amazing animal that although brought many trying times for me proved to be the most loyal pet anyone could ever ask for. I miss him running to the door when I open it. I miss him cleaning up the crumbs on the floor. I miss the protective feeling he gave me, just by being in the house.

I will truly Jasper.

Craziness

The month of May is always crazy. After Spring Break from school things just seem to get crazy. The amount of hours in a day never seem enough and the list of things to do never seems to get shorter. It's also when I look forward to Summer Break beginning and life slowing down a bit so I can enjoy my boys. This summer we'll be spending our time gardening and playing. I see playdates, Summerfest, and the library storytime in our near future. In the meantime I'll just keep pluggin' along. 24 school days left :)

Chicks

Well we have 22 chicks. We started with 20, one died and another had a raw fanny so Jason went back and they gave him 4 more. Today Jason informed me that we're down 2 chicks. One is missing and the other he's pretty sure is dead as there are feathers everywhere. They started out inside in a box with a heat lamp and we've since moved them outside which I like a lot better. They were getting quite stinky and making a mess. I'm excited for them to start laying eggs but a little nervous at the amount we'll get.

Spring Break

These are the weeks I know why I became a teacher...spring break, winter break, summer, and recess :)

Playset

So I've been looking for a playset for our backyard. We have two small plastic sets that Liam is pretty much outgrown. I'd like something that has a slide and something else for him to do, whether it be a tire swing or rock wall. My sister in law and brother in law have one that Liam just loves. I went and looked at one today...it was posted in the HoCoMo Freddie for $150. What a piece of crap! The ad said it was 4 years old...I think they left out a 0. It said new headbars, there wasn't anything new about it...and $150, I think this lady must have been smokin' something.

Maybe the next one will be better :)

Jasper

Jason bought a blue heeler before we were together. The dog was born in 2000. He is very smart and a good watch dog. When I got pregnant with Liam we contemplated giving him away because he didn't seem like a kid kind of dog and were were a little afraid of what might happen. He has surprised us A LOT and done very well not only with Liam but now with Quinn who chases him around (crawling), takes his bone (would have started a fight in his earlier years), and eats his food, oh yes you read that correctly, Quinn enjoys chewing on Jasper's food, yuck!

Things started getting weird with him last year when he started having seizures. He would be running and all of a sudden, fall over, go stiff (still breathing though, just labored) then a few minutes later he'd get up a little confused and go about what he was doing. We started him on some medicine and he'd been doing ok then the seizures started getting more frequent even with the medicine so we upped it. Well, his belly started getting really big but you could see his ribs and spine so we took him back to the vet who diagnosed him with liver cancer that has gone into his lungs. Poor guy. He's had a good run, I'll miss him dearly, but after tonight I'm ready for him to go :( We went to a birthday party at 3:30. I arrived home at 7:30 to find poop, all over his cage. He proceeds to run up the stairs to the front door then back to the basement stairs. Meanwhile I have Liam and Quinn both very tired, fussing. So I get some antibacterial spray and a rag and wipe up the trail of poop that leads up the stairs and to the front door. After getting the kids to bed, I take his cage and blankets outside and hose everything off. As I'm bringing the blankets back into the basement to put in the washing machine a clump of poop plops on the inside rim of washing machine. I should have prefaced this whole post with I HATE POOP!

Why?

I often wonder why God chooses certain people to have/die from cancer? To me, it seems like such a fast spreading disease from all different causes and no one can cure it.

Second note, I wonder why God chooses certain people to have such difficult lives. I feel sorry for them and think, what have I done that allows me to live such a smooth life.

Thank you God for blessing me, please continue to walk beside each individual that deals with struggles everyday.

I hate pumping...not for those who aren't about nursing

I breastfed Liam and pumped for a total of 9 months. This go round I'm breastfeeding Quinn and have been pumping for 8 months and I don't want to do it any longer. It is uncomfortable to nurse and pump, actually I'm uncomfortable physically ALL the time. As much as I don't want to give up breastfeeding I could definitely do without the pumping...TBC I'm going to chat with the pedi.

Something fun about Quinn

So Quinn is almost a year...10.5 months to be exact and he is such a happy baby. I enjoy snuggling, playing, and reading with him. He's all boy and likes to get down and play. He is happy to play by himself or tag along behind Liam and try to get whatever Liam's playing with. He's mastered climbing up the stairs, scary for us but fun for him, and is working on becoming stable when walking behind a toy. He doesn't say much, mostly ma ma but we're working on signing and reading with him in hopes that he'll pick up some more words soon.

My sister-in-law had a baby August of last year so her little one and Quinn are 3 months apart. I can't wait until they get just a little big older and can play together as I think they'll be best of friends.

WOW!

So I subscribe to many peoples' blogs and check them regularly to see if anyone has posted something new. I usually use Google Reader but today I decided to add a friend's blog address to my blogger site. July, 2009 is the last time I posted! Holy mackeral a lot has happened since then. Let's start with I got pregnant and had another wonderful, sweet boy, Quinn :) he's now almost a year old. I am still teaching first grade at Clarksville Elementary but will be changing to third grade next year, scary but I think it will be an awesome change. Jason is working for Howard County Gov't inspecting underground utilities and loving it! Liam is 3 and running circles around Jason and I. He keeps us entertained and busy all at the same time. Perhaps I'll post more if I use this site rather than Google Reader to read other peoples' blogs :)